Get to know me | The Perfectly Imperfect Mother
Ideally, I would start my day by drinking a glass of warm lemon water. Do either yoga or meditation, make a nice healthy smoothie before making affirmations of how my day is going to be. I've heard that doing this will project the energy you want to the universe and hence it becomes a self fulfilling prophecy. You are your thoughts and all that kind of business.
Once I am nicely, awake I start to get the kids up and out of bed ready for school, The first chore of the day would be to make a nice breakfast for the family; then drive the brood to two different schools happily singing along to Taylor swift or old school Beyoncé.
I would return home to find the cleaners have arrived and with the wave of a magic wand the house is spotless the candles are lit. Walla! Mama has the house to herself, all I need to do is take Instagram pictures update my blog respond to emails and like other people's post on IG.
With the bonus of enjoying a nice cosy bath before, making my way out for brunch with some friends and a spot of shopping, maybe a facial or manicure before returning home for the school run.
I would have the perfect kids who do as they are told and are not smart mouths who have an answer for everything, they would be helpful around the house and realise that their dad and I have their best interest at heart.
Oh my lovely friends if only wishes were horses this beggar would ride up the hills and far far away.
In reality, I am one hot mess; It begins with me snoozing the alarm 4 times. Yes I am the adult who is not suppose to snooze thier arlam clock but I do. Hear me out; This happens because the previous night, I slept too late trying to catchup with blogs that I follow, write down inspirations, update my blog, mark the childrens home work before trying to catchup with the goodwife, it helps me to wind down you see.
So 20 minutes late, I jump out of bed screaming my sons name shouting at him to get into the bathroom pronto, when he says he needs to use the toilet, I shout "no one has time for that make that shower a quick one."
Are you exhausted on my behalf already? Wait for it. My attempt at a cooked Breakfast ends in vain as everything is burnt or not made at all so the kids end up having cereal. We will most likey stop by the nearest waitrose or sainsubry to get school lunches, I just don't have the time to make them.
The older kids are tip toeing around me by now so as not to tread on my toes till they leave the house. Oh don't feel sorry for them they get their own back, One is shouting "mum you look extra pretty today are you not feeling well." And thats not a compliment believe me.
The other shouts "I am staying over for gymnastics and water polo at school, could you pick me up later today," and so the story goes on.
Getting them out of the house is another story, it takes me a good ten minutes, thank God the teachers seem to understand and have some empathy for my chaos, not to mention the lack of punctuality.
Sigh, I have finally got the house empty, I make myself a cup of tea and sit down, look around me and a bomb has gone off in this house for sure.
It's time to clean, As soon as I am done and about do what I call something productive, I get a call from school "Mrs Moyo your son is not well could you come and get him." Trying to sound like the best mum possible, I enquire; oh! is he okay, of course! I know he is oaky; I took him to school myself this morning. He most likely just over ate as boys do. My heart sinks at yet another realisation that one child is staying at home sick at the same time battling my conscience thinking I am a terrible mother for even insinuating these thoughts.
Well the joke is on me, I pick my son up from school he asks if we can stop by Mcdonalds, and he spends the rest of the day gallivanting around the house asking if he is going to school tomorrow.
I haven't even mentioned the days I have to go to work, did I mention I am not a single mum happily married to a helpful husband, He just doesn't do things to my standards so I would rather do them myself eventually burning the candle from both ends.
So all the single ladies out there be careful what you wish for as most of us yummy mummys are just doing the best we can in the best way we know how to sum it all up one hot mess.